


When Fish Need Bicycles

by mandykaysfic



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Alien Biology, Alien Culture, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-13
Updated: 2014-04-13
Packaged: 2018-01-19 04:09:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1454842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mandykaysfic/pseuds/mandykaysfic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The crew of Voyager attend a function that has an unexpected outcome.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When Fish Need Bicycles

“Queen Xiphophorus has invited us to spend some time with her people. They seem friendly, and their trading terms are more than fair. I think we can accept her offer.” Captain Janeway scanned the faces of her senior staff. Gouram's landmasses covered barely twenty percent of the planet’s surface and the small population’s lifestyle was primarily water-based. Information regarding a number of interesting sporting and leisure activities had been provided for perusal and Tom and Harry looked particularly interested, but that may have had a lot to do with the appearance of the Gourami; so far those they had seen were all were exceedingly attractive women. Tuvok's assessment of the rules and traditions was favorable. There were no restricted religious festivals due to take place, bartering was permissible and peaceful alien visitors were welcomed. Neelix was already excited about the local foodstuffs, most of which were suitable for the crew to safely consume. Even the Doctor waxed poetic about some new medical treatments he could adapt for various ailments. Engineering was the only department that would not derive some benefit from the trade, but the Gourami had already provided them with the coordinates for the planet where they acquired their dilithium, along with details of the usual trading terms. B'Elanna had resigned herself to waiting another week or so to get some things Voyager sorely needed. Chakotay was keen for the crew to have shore leave while they could. “Very well. Two days of shore leave will commence at 0800 tomorrow morning. You'll need to get busy on the rosters, Commander. Oh, and sixty of the staff, including ourselves, will attend the ball this evening organized by Queen Xiphophorus. She has requested we wear our most exquisite costumes.”

“Not dress uniform then?” asked Harry.

“I wouldn't call Starfleet dress uniform 'exquisite',” interjected B'Elanna.

“Oh, I don't know about that – the elegant lines of -,” began Tom.

Janeway raised her hand. “Everyone will be issued with enough credit to replicate something suitable. No dress uniforms.” She looked around once more. “Any further questions? Dismissed.”

 

~ 

 

“Captain Janeway, welcome to you and your crew. Queen Xiphophorus is anxiously awaiting your presence. Your costumes are indeed magnificent. I'm sure she will not be disappointed.” Prime Assistant Symphysodon fluttered around, examining the first group of six to beam down. She waved over one of the women waiting to one side of the reception room. “Colosia, you will escort the first of our guests to the Grand Hall.”

“You will please follow me.” Colosia glided across the floor. Her floorlength dress of glittering silver clung to her body. Narrow diagonal stripes of shades grey and black emphasized her curves in a pleasing fashion. 

Tom and Harry exchanged appreciative smiles and fell in behind the captain, Chakotay, Tuvok and B'Elanna. Their view of Colosia was swallowed up by others, but it was no hardship to watch B’Elanna’s familiar rear view, especially as she was wearing something clingy in pink. Not a Neelix sort of pink - rather it was a delicate, pale shimmery pink that made her complexion glow and Harry's mouth water. “B'Elanna sure looks beautiful,” murmured Harry, wondering whether she was wearing any underwear. He was resplendent in a close-fitting outfit of black, emerald green and white that he'd acquired from a little planet they'd visited some months ago.

“Yeah, but Captain Janeway's got that certain something, y'know?”

“Only because she's the captain. It's the dignity that comes with the role, like royalty, whereas B'Elanna...” 

Tuvok turned back to stare them into silence as they approached the grand hall.

“In order please, of seniority,” fussed Colosia. “It is required. Poecilia will present you.”

Stark black and white emphasized Poecilia’s reed thinness. With her hair dyed in a matching pattern of tessellations she could have modelled successfully for any one of the avant-garde fashion designers of the alpha quadrant. Quietly efficient, she presented them one at a time, reciting from memory their antecedents and educational achievements as provided by Voyager at the Queen’s request. Queen Xiphophorus nodded formally to each one and, with the exception of Commander Chakotay, whom she requested remain with her, personally introduced each to their partner for the evening.

Chakotay stood over to one side where Poecilia indicated and watched with interest as Captain Janeway met the immediate past Regent, who happened to be the Queen’s sister. Possibly her twin, he thought, as the women looked identical. Only subtle differences in their ball gowns allowed him to tell them apart without closer inspection. He caught only a few words of their conversation before turning his attention to Tuvok. Buffei had obviously been apprised of Vulcan cultural mores as she led him away without physically touching him. When he saw the young woman assigned to Tom Paris he had to wonder how they were selected. Brazen was the word that first came into his mind. The top part of her dress was a bright scarlet, cut low to emphasize magnificent breasts. Glittering gold clung to rounded hips, the effect of which was possibly lost on Tom, who was standing too close to appreciate the full effect, although she seemed to have no trouble admiring his formal wear. 

Tom had chosen the Terran classic full evening dress, complete with top hat and cane, but his whole ensemble had been replicated in white. He found himself captivated by sloe-black eyes that gazed back into his with intent. “I’m Nattereri,” came the husky drawl. She tucked her arm into Tom’s. “I understand you’re Voyager's chief pilot. That must be so exciting. Come, I have a table over in the corner.” 

Titteya, a pretty young woman in a predominantly cherry-colored dress highlighted with twin black stripes running from beneath her arms to her ankles, took Harry’s arm. “This is my first Occasion,” she explained. “I’m looking forward to the entire evening.” 

“Titteya”, began Harry, but she interrupted. 

“Call me Cherry,” she urged with a high-pitched giggle as she escorted him over to a table for two. Half a dozen girls of a similar age had squeezed themselves around an adjacent table. Hands covering their mouths, they whispered to one another. Their shoulders shook as they tried to suppress their laughter. Harry flung a quick look in their direction, but Cherry steered him to the seat that faced away from them and concentrated on keeping his attention solely on her.

The Voyager crew were quickly paired with hostesses. Neelix could be seen talking animatedly to a woman whose red and silver dress glowed with iridescent blue stripes instead of the ubiquitous black that seemed to be the current fashion trend. Several of the Maquis, notably Ayala, Dalby, Gerron and Henley appeared to have defied Captain Janeway’s orders and worn their Maquis clothing, but the wild and rugged look was obviously exotic enough to find favour with the locals, so Chakotay did nothing. Instead, he pondered on the absence of Gourami males, until Poecilia indicated it was time for him to escort the Queen to the main table. She then slipped into her place at the head table with her partner, Samantha Wildman.

Chakotay was a little disconcerted to find they had to slowly walk a circuit of the room back to the nearby top table, stepping in time to an obviously formal set piece of music played by a small orchestra, but he kept his gaze firmly ahead and ignored the grins of those Maquis who were seated closest to his path. He was well aware of the soundless mouthed comments of the hoary ‘walk this way’ gag; the queen’s rolling sway doubtless required a significant amount of practise to get one’s hips moving in that precise fashion. Instead, he concentrated on keeping pace and maintaining a suitably dignified expression until they took their seats at the centre of the main table.

In a mercifully brief speech, the queen welcomed the crew of Voyager and the first course of the evening was served straight away. Chakotay turned his attention from the blue-uniformed servants to Queen Xiphophorus and conversed diplomatically, even as he wondered at their appearance. The royal court obviously believed in uniformity in appearance as well as dress contributed to keeping the menials unobtrusive; as far as he could tell, all of the young girls could have been sisters, so alike were they. Perhaps because the rulers were sisters?

The bowls that had contained a delicately flavored clear soup had no sooner been cleared when the music changed from a pleasant background accompaniment to something that resembled a Latin American rhythm. Harry wasn't the only one whose head began nodding in time with the infectious beat. A dozen young women, arrayed in bright jewel-toned costumes danced into the room. They swirled around, forming patterns in groups of twos, threes and fours until they sank to the floor, spread out in various poses at the finale. The Voyager crew were enthusiastic in their applause.

“They will perform again, to demonstrate the Bright Future. That is the dance to ensure a future relationship is possible between our peoples and as such, it is the one you will all join in,” explained Poecilia to those at the main table. “Do not worry. Your chosen partners are all well versed in the movements and will guide you through.”

“I shall look forward to it,” said Chakotay smoothly and inclined his head respectfully to the queen.

“As shall I,” responded Queen Xiphophorus as her royal gaze flickered over Chakotay's face and upper body, and then she turned the conversation to something else as the next course, sticky balls of a rice-like grain studded with colorful vegetables, was served. Children sang tunefully and an acrobatic team performed between the next courses. 

Poecilia kept an eye on the proceedings and when the queen had eaten two squares of a clear gelatine-like substance embedded with tiny flowers, she rang a bell. As one the Gourami quivered with anticipation and faced the dance floor. “The Dance of the Bright Future,” announced Poecilia, her voice reaching all corners of the room. She rang the bell again and the orchestra struck up a rhythm that seemed to stir the blood a little more with every phrase.

“Watch closely,” Cherry urged Harry. “This dance is only done at an Occasion. When they are done, you will do this with me. Don't worry. I will teach you the movements. I’ve been practicing for several months now.” She blushed, and than turned to frown at her friends as another round of giggles from the next table interrupted the atmosphere she was trying to create for Harry. 

Harry stared in horrified fascination as the girls, this time clad in little more than scanty bathing costumes and scarves, performed a dance with movements that at first glance belonged more in Randolph Biddle's copy of 'Return of the Orion Slave Girls' than at a royal dinner. Unable to tear his eyes away for even a brief respite, he eventually noticed that at no time did the partners actually touch each other and breathed a little easier. Five verse-and-chorus repetitions later, the music crashed to a rousing crescendo then girls broke formation and fluttered off to the sides of the floor.

An aura of expectation hung over the room and Queen Xiphophorus stood and held out her hand to Chakotay. He rose to the occasion and escorted her to the centre of the floor as thought he’d been born royalty. His choice of basic black evening wear had been a fortunate choice as it served to keep everyone’s attention focussed on the royal magnificence. From their central position he could see almost half of the crew as the Gourami smilingly led their partners to apparently pre-determined places. The dancers paired up and quickly dispersed themselves among the crowd on the floor. 

It started simply; a few circling steps where partners mirrored one another. On the whole, the Voyager crew did themselves proud. Chakotay caught sight of Tom, who was having no trouble at all. He and his partner gave the impression they'd danced together many times before. Hips swayed, spines arched seductively, hands caressed only the air. Tuvok was almost as expert as Tom; he moved with such grace and elegance Chakotay wondered why he never danced at any of Voyager's functions. He suppressed a smile at Harry's troubles; it looked like his young partner was confusing him with her instructions. She looked flushed and more than a little embarrassed. Recalling who he was dancing with, he turned his attention back to the queen and concentrated on keeping in time with the music and matching her movements with a graceful rhythm and style of his own.

The ball wound down surprisingly quickly after 'The Dance of Bright Future'. There was a closing address, equally as brief as the welcome speech, and the guests were encouraged to leave. Tom couldn't resist teasing Harry over having Cherry as a partner and pondered aloud Harry’s chances of being asked to the movies or the local equivalent of the mall with Cherry and a bunch of her giggling friends. 

“She didn't mention anything of the sort. In fact, we didn't make any arrangements to get together at all. Anyway, I suppose you'll be spending all your shore leave with Nattereri.” Harry was a little disgruntled. Tom would be off with a local girl again while he would be left to his own devices as usual, although in this instance he was quite pleased he wouldn’t have to spend the day with Cherry; she was so young. He perked up at Tom’s frown and drawled response of ‘well, actually…’. So despite Tom’s best efforts, he didn’t have a date for shore leave either. And back on board Voyager, it didn’t take long to find out that nobody was seeing their companion from the ball. Even the captain was free for the following two days.

Swimming, skiing, snorkelling, submersibles – between them, the crew tried out practically every available activity on offer. Captain Janeway sought a final audience with Queen Xiphophorus before Voyager departed, but Poecilia reported the Queen had entered seclusion in anticipation of a Bright Future, as had forty-eight others, and as a result she had been authorized to double the amount of foodstuffs offered in trade. The senior staff exchanged puzzled glances, but the captain’s thanks were effusive. 

The EMH interrupted. “Poecilia, may I enquire as to the nature of the seclusion? Is it due to an illness? The risk of infection -”

Poecilia cut him off. “No, no. On the contrary. Never have we had such a response to the Dance of Bright Future. The Queen and the chosen are not ill. They are reproducing and several of them are already showing signs of multitudinous offspring. This is an occasion for celebration for all of us. Sometimes many years pass between visits from strangers.”

“Reproducing?” Janeway targeted each of her staff with a laser-like glance. Surely it was impossible that any of her crew were responsible. She turned to the Doctor, who was making exclamations of sudden comprehension.

“Cloning. They reproduce by cloning. That explains why we’ve not seen any males. If I could speak with some of your medical personnel?” The Doctor oozed scientific curiosity. “Asexual reproduction was always thought to lead to extinction.”

“As you can see, we are not extinct,” laughed Poecilia. “I will see what can be arranged. There is still some small time before you leave.” She left to consult with the appropriate authorities.

The captain issued some further orders that took into account the increased trade and then dismissed everyone.

“So you're going to be a daddy!” Harry punched Tom on the arm as they stood. Nattereri was one of those in seclusion. Cherry, who was not, was apparently being consoled by her friends.

“Did you fail biology, Mr Kim? Cloning is not a form of sexual reproduction.” The EMH looked reproachfully at Harry. 

Harry nodded and grinned widely as he continued to tease Tom, their voices echoing down the corridor as they headed to the turbolift. B'Elanna turned her thoughts to the dilithium she hoped they'd obtain next week. Tuvok merely looked inscrutable, while Chakotay pondered whether he and the others were morally parents and Kathryn gave thanks she'd never had a fish tank installed.

END

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this article:  
> “Researchers are pondering how an exclusively-female fish species has survived without genetically self-destructing itself into extinction, the BBC reports. The Amazon Molly, found in Mexico and Texas, reproduces by cloning, and while it does "interact" with chaps from other species to "trigger its reproduction process", doesn't utilise any of their DNA in producing offspring. While this might be considered proof of the old saw that "a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle", scientists from the University of Edinburgh applied "complex mathematical models" to demonstrate that the Amazon Molly should in fact have become extinct within the last 70,000 years as a result of the adverse genetic changes resulting from asexual reproduction.” Dr Laurence Loewe


End file.
